


The one where Kihyun wakes up as a girl.

by sereny_mx



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Falling In Love, Gender Change
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-02
Updated: 2018-02-02
Packaged: 2019-03-12 18:00:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13552656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sereny_mx/pseuds/sereny_mx
Summary: One morning, Kihyun wakes up as a girl and as much as it scares the other members, Wonho just can't keep himself from falling for him... or her.





	The one where Kihyun wakes up as a girl.

Sunday morning. Wonho sat at the kitchen table, still half-asleep and in a bad mood. Minyhuk forced him awake early because he had to _eat_. Apparently. Wonho stared moodily into his bowl of cereal. What was so great about eating anyway? He could live on coffee and music alone.   
  
Minyhuk reached over and tapped him on the head, none too lightly, with a spoon. "Where's Kihyun?"  
  
"Still sleeping."  
  
Minyhuk raised a suspicious eyebrow. "He never sleeps in this long. Is he sick?"  
  
Hyunwoo set down a glass of milk in front of Changkyun and leant back against the worktop. "I don't think so. He seemed normal."  
  
"He was sleeping."  
  
"Guys."  
  
Wonho looked up to see Kihyun standing in the doorway, pale-faced and clutching his breasts. Clutching his _what?_ -  
  
"Guys," Kihyun whispered, "I've got tits." His voice sounded slightly panicked.  
  
No one said anything. Minyhuk coughed. "Um, what did you say?"  
  
"Look," Kihyun said, and pulled up his t-shirt. "Tits!"  
  
"Shit," Wonho said.  
  
"Sweet mother of- Changkyun, close your eyes!" Hyunwoo leapt forward to clamp a hand over Changkyun's face.   
  
"Hyung!" Changkyun's whine was somewhat muffled. "Why are you allowed to look?"  
  
Wonho looked over and noted, with interest, that Hyunwoo was looking. Staring, even.  
  
"I'm not!" Hyunwoo looked away, appearing slightly flustered. "I said close your eyes!"  
  
"I don't give a monkey’s ass who looks!" Kihyun 's voice cut through the chaos. "I've got tits! And a freakin’ vagi--"  
  
"Pants will stay ON in this kitchen!" Minyhuk's voice of authority immediately brought silence. Wonho was sort of impressed. " Kihyun, please. Pull your shirt down and keep your pants up." Minyhuk steered Kihyun down into a seat. "What happened?"  
  
Kihyun stared at Minyhuk incredulously. "What do you think happened? I turned into a girl!"  
  
"People don't just turn into girls, Kihyun," Hyunwoo said, looking anywhere except Kihyun. "Who did this to you?"  
  
"I don't fucking know, Hyunwoo hyung." Kihyun was angry, but Wonho noticed the slight change in pitch. "Maybe it was Jooheon's fairy godmother?"  
  
"Kihyun-ah," Wonho said, reaching over to take Kihyun's hand. He smiled.  
  
"What?" Kihyun replied, his anger turning a little bit watery around the edges.  
  
"You've got a bigger rack than Hyunwoo now."   
  
Changkyun was the only one who laughed.  


X

  
  
  
An emergency meeting was called and they woke the oblivious Hyungwon up who almost stumbled over his own feet when he saw Kihyun’s boobs. Kihyun sat on the sofa with his (her?) arms crossed over his chest and a deep scowl on his face. Wonho could tell he was trying not to cry.  
  
“Right,” their manager said, pacing the floor like a madman. “Right. Obviously this is just some freak of nature acci-“  
  
“You think I’m a freak of nature?”  
  
“Don’t talk about Kihyun that way!”  
  
Their manager stopped pacing and swallowed hard. “O-Of course not, that’s not what I- anyway, it’s not _right_.” He paused and tapped his chin thoughtfully. “We need to keep this on the low. No one can find out until we know what’s going on. We should go to a hospital.”  
  
Kihyun visibly wilted. “Hospital?”  
  
Hyungwon wrapped an arm around Kihyun (Wonho noted that he seemed to be avoiding contact with any soft bits that might make people blush) and pulled him close. “They’ll do funny tests on him, hyung. Can’t we just get him checked out here first?”  
  
Wonho hummed in agreement. “I agree, hyung.” He looked over at Kihyun and smiled encouragingly. “We can check whether he’s fully healthy or not and then decide what to do.”  
  
Minhyuk and Hyunwoo nodded. “Wow, Wonho,” Hyunwoo said, impressed. “Check you out.”  
  
Wonho flipped him off.  
  
“Okay,” their manager sighed, “we’ll do that.” He turned to Kihyun. “It’ll be okay, Kihyun. We’ll sort it out.” He smiled and left to make some phone calls.   
  
Everyone immediately gathered around Kihyun.   
  
“Don’t worry, Kyeon-ah. You’ll be fine.”  
  
“I’m sure you can be changed back.” Hyungwon said.  
  
Kihyun’s face crumpled and he hid behind his hands. “Thanks guys,” he mumbled. “I don’t even know what to think.”  
  
Wonho knelt in front of Kihyun and touched his leg lightly. “Come on, Kyeon-ah. Look at me.” He smiled when Kihyun peeked out from behind his fingers. “Everything will be fine, I promise.”  
  
Kihyun sniffed and gave him a wobbly smile.   
  
“And hey,” Wonho continued, “at least no one will notice the voice change—ouch!” he yelped as six hands smacked him upside the head.  


X

  
  
  
“Everything seems to be in full working order,” the doctor said, packing away his things. “What you’ve got here is a fully operational female.”  
  
Hyungwon sighed. “But she didn’t start out that way!”  
  
The doctor coughed. “Well, yes. I’ve taken some blood and urine samples so we can do some tests. But right now, she’s healthy.” He patted Kihyun on the head, somewhat like a puppy. “All you can do is wait, dear.”  
  
“Thanks for coming out,” Hyunwoo said, guiding the doctor to the door. “Our manager will call you later to confirm the payment.”  
  
The doctor smiled. “Just take care of her, okay? It’s going to be difficult. Her hormone levels are going to be all over place for a while.” He shook his head as he left. “A house full of boys. Heaven help her.”  
  
Wonho glanced back to Kihyun and felt his heart thump at the sight of her pout. Even with lady parts, Kihyun was still cute. He sat down next to Kihyun and laced his fingers through hers. “See? You’re fine. They’ll find a cure.”  
  
Kihyun squeezed Wonho’s hand and groaned. “I don’t think I’ll ever get over the trauma.”  
  
“Hey, come on. You just have to keep going. We’re all here for you.”  
  
Kihyun stared at Wonho imploringly. “You don’t understand, Wonho.”   
  
“I know,” Wonho agreed. “But tell me?”  
  
“That,” Kihyun sighed, “was the most disgusting thing I’ve ever had to do.”  
  
“What?” Minhyuk asked.  
  
“Peeing into the sample bottle.” Kihyun gagged. “You can’t even aim! It’s just… there. I pissed all over my hand.”  
  
Wonho let out a strangled yell and desperately tried to untangle his hand from Kihyun’s. Changkyun and Jooheon curled over with laughter, Hyunwoo and Minhyuk trying to prop them up but failing.  
  
“Oh, Wonho hyung. Your face. That was classic.” Changkyun gasped out between giggles.   
  
“That, um,” Hyunwoo tried to keep a straight face, “that’s enough now.” He snorted and Wonho fixed him with The Glare.   
  
“Kihyun, you’re sick!” Wonho stared at his hand and blanched.  
  
“Sick?” Kihyun whispered.   
  
Wonho tore his gaze away from his soiled hand to Kihyun’s face. The pout was back, complete with liquid eyes. “Kihyun, I- not like that…”  
  
“No, you’re right,” Kihyun mumbled. “I am sick. But you try waking up with a vagina!” She pulled her knees up and hugged them to her chest. “Everything feels so open.”  
  
Hyungwon scowled at Wonho. “Now look what you’ve done, idiot. You’re supposed to be good with women.” He swooped in to cuddle Kihyun, trying to coax her into smiling.  
  
“I’m good at sleeping with them!” Wonho spluttered. “And that’s not a woman, it’s Kihyun.”  
  
Kihyun looked up with a hurt expression. “Oh, thanks. You teased me when I was a man, and now I’m not woman enough for you? I feel like a warped Britney Spears.” A pair of tears rolled down her cheeks and she rubbed them away angrily. Exactly the way boy Kihyun would.  
  
Hyunwoo punched Wonho in the arm. “Now look, you’ve upset her already.”  
  
“Ouch! What?”  
  
Changkyun clapped him on the back. “Nice one, buddy.”  
  
Wonho huffed as he was pushed out of the way. He glared at the ceiling and tried not to slide his gaze back to the curve of Kihyun’s nose or soft line of her neck.  


X

  
  
  
“You guys will have to keep working. We can’t afford time off.”  
  
“But what about Kihyun?”  
  
“He- She- Kihyun will have to stay at home, I’m afraid.”  
  
“What?  
  
“She can’t stay at home alone!”  
  
“It’s the only way. Just until we hear from the specialists.”  
  
“But in her condition… ”  
  
“It’s only during the day. You’ll be home at night.”  
  
“But that’s not—Kihyun…”  
  
“It’s fine, guys. Really.”  
  
“Oh, Kihyun.”  


X

  
  
  
It was decided, after much (failed) arguing from Hyunwoo and Minhyuk, that Kihyun would take time out from their schedule. She would stay at home, alone, in the apartment until a cure was found. Or at least an explanation.   
  
Wonho felt bad for making fun of her before. It was difficult – she was still Kihyun in Wonho’s eyes. The Kihyun with too much swagger in his step, the one who told bad jokes and teased Wonho about his nostrils. And really, girl Kihyun wasn’t much different. She was just a whole lot more defensive.   
  
He tentatively knocked on the door to the larger shared bedroom. “Kihyun? Can I come in?”  
  
“Sure.”   
  
Wonho smiled; Kihyun’s voice wasn’t that different – still soft, steady. Just a little bit higher, smoother. He pushed the door open and padded over to the bed Kihyun was sitting on. “How are you doing?”  
  
She looked up as Wonho sat down and gave him a small smile. “Okay, I guess. I had to call my parents and pretend that I was sick.”  
  
Wonho frowned. “I’m sorry.”  
  
Kihyun sighed and leaned back on her hands. She was wearing pajamas, the sweatpants clinging to her curves even more than usual. Wonho tried desperately not to stare at her breasts under the t-shirt.  
  
“It’s okay,” Kihyun smiled, “you can look if you want.”  
  
“I- What? No!” Wonho spluttered.  
  
Kihyun grinned, echoes of boy Kihyun in the gleam of her teeth. “I’ve spent hours looking at them.” She sat forward and made a show of cupping her boobs. “If it was one of you, I’d be looking!”  
  
Wonho coughed. “I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.”   
  
“Aww,” Kihyun cooed.   
  
Wonho scowled at her sarcasm. “Shut up. I’ve seen loads of boobs before. I don’t need to see your pitiful attempts.”  
  
They both giggled. Kihyun reached out for one of Wonho’s hands. Wonho couldn’t help but notice how soft her skin was. Her hands were still as small as boy Kihyun’s, but smoother and more delicate. He lifted her hand and kissed the back of it gently.  
  
“What are you doing?” Kihyun asked with amusement evident in her voice.  
  
Wonho glanced up and swallowed. “Um. I’m not sure.”  
  
Kihyun pulled her hand away and laughed, pushing Wonho. “You’re so weird. Don’t start hitting on me just because I haven’t got a dick anymore.”  
  
Wonho grinned and leered, “I hit on you even when you did have boy parts.”  
  
Kihyun shuddered theatrically. “I know.” She smoothed down the sides of her hair, automatic, and sighed again.  
  
“Hey,” Wonho touched her knee. “You know it’ll be okay, right? You’re still Kihyun. We’ll fix this.”  
  
“I know,” She gave Wonho a small smile. “I hope so. I’m really starting to miss the little brother.” She made a face. “This…thing just looks like an open wound.”  
  
Wonho laughed and moved round to hug Kihyun, rocking her from side to side. “You’re definitely still Kihyun. Don’t ever lose that innocence, okay?”   
  
She wrapped her arms around Wonho’s waist and pressed her face into Wonho’s neck. “Thank you, Wonho. For being nice. And normal,” she whispered against his skin and Wonho’s tummy did a little flip at the warmth of her mouth.  


X

  
  
  
For a week, Kihyun sat around the apartment and moped. They left each morning with awkward smiles (Wonho, Hyunwoo and Jooheon) and worried frowns (Minhyuk, Hyungwon and Changkyun). They returned each night to find her sitting in front of the television, eyes boring a hole into the screen and still wearing the same pair of pajamas. Their manager spoke to the doctors every day and assured them that work was being done and so far, nothing had been found in Kihyun’s samples to threaten her health. Mostly, this didn’t improve Kihyun’s mood.   
  
When Friday came around, enough was enough. Wonho stumbled through the door at some ungodly hour, the others following behind. Kihyun was sprawled across the couch, empty chip packets and half-eaten candy bars littered the floor around her. The television was blaring with some American romantic comedy.  
  
Minhyuk huffed irritably and kicked his shoes off. “Kihyun, have you been sitting there all day?”  
  
Kihyun shrugged her shoulders and made a non-committal noise.   
  
“I’m going to get a drink.” Changkyun whispered before escaping to the kitchen.  
  
“Come on, Kihyun.” Hyunwoo rounded the sofa and crouched down in front of her. “You need to stop this. You don’t even like these snacks. Plus, the Kihyun I know wouldn’t ever create such a mess and not clean up after.”  
  
Wonho ambled over and shoved Kihyun’s legs out of the way to perch on the edge of the couch. He squeezed her calf muscle gently. “You should take a shower and change your clothes, at least.”  
  
Kihyun stretched. Wonho swallowed down tiny sparks of lust. “I feel sick,” Kihyun said.  
  
“Of course you do.” Minyhuk ruffled her hair, still a bit exasperated. “All that crap you’ve eaten can’t be good. Take a shower and stop sulking.”  
  
Kihyun looked up and scowled. “You didn’t turn into a girl.”  
  
“No, I didn’t.” Minhyuk pulled Hyunwoo up and motioned for the kitchen. “But if I had, I’d make sure as hell that I didn’t still smell like a dude.”  
  
Wonho hid a smile as the eldest walked away and Kihyun spluttered.  
  
“He’s sort of right,” Wonho said. He took Kihyun’s hand and heaved her up into a sitting position. “You’ll feel better after a shower. Promise.”  
  
Kihyun looked down and absently played with Wonho’s fingers. “I know I’m being an ass.” She sighed and drew patterns on one of Wonho’s palms with her fingertip. “I just don’t know what to do with myself.”  
  
“Keep on like this and you’ll be too fat and disgusting to leave the room.” Wonho grinned.  
  
Kihyun looked up and put on an exaggerated pout. “So mean.”  
  
Wonho bit his lip. “Don’t give me the puppy eyes. Go and wash, please. For my sanity.”  
  
“That’s a lost cause.” Kihyun stuck out her tongue and pushed herself up. She smiled at Wonho. “I’ll try and perk up.”  
  
“That’s my b--girl!” Wonho winked. She flipped him off and left.  
  
Wonho sighed and slumped back, staring at the ceiling and wishing he were outside with stars to count. The sound of running water made him smile a bit. She was still the same old stubborn Kihyun.   
  
“Don’t even think about it,” Hyungwon said as he flopped down onto the couch.  
  
Wonho looked over at him. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”  
  
Hyungwon snorted and Wonho punched him in the arm. “Where is the old couple?”  
  
“Probably being disgustingly sappy in the kitchen.” Hyungwon made a face. “I left when they started making cow eyes at each other over the fridge door.”  
  
“Smart move, Batman.”  
  
“You’re weird.”  
  
“You’re the Godfather of weird.”  
  
“You’re weird’s greatest—“  
  
“Shut up, both of you,” Minhyuk yelled from the kitchen. “You’re ruining Special Time between Mommy and Daddy.”  
  
Wonho blanched. “Let’s go. I don’t need to witness anything special from those two. Especially now that Minhyuk has taken over the role of the mother ever since Kihyun has been… you know.” He pulled Hyungwon up and headed towards the bedrooms. Hyungwon paused at the door to his, Kihyun and Hyunwoo’s shared room.  
  
“If Hyunwoo hyung catches you…”  
  
Wonho raised an eyebrow. “Catches me what?”  
  
Hyungwon gave him a pointed look. “Whatever,” he said, shaking his head and opening his door.   
  
Wonho rested his forehead against his own bedroom door and sighed heavily. He needed a girlfriend, a real one. He pushed the door open and went to sit on his bed. There was probably enough time to jerk off before Minhyuk finished his ‘special’ activities with their fearless leader.  


X

  
  
  
“Ooo! Post!”   
  
Wonho craned his neck to look over the back of the couch and watched Minhyuk hop around excitedly in the main doorway. He turned back to Kihyun and made a face. They were sitting together, idly holding hands and watching inane Japanese Saturday morning television.   
  
“What’s going on?” Kihyun asked, half distracted by a beautiful young lady on the screen.  
  
“Apart from the increasing levels of lesbianism in this household?”   
  
Kihyun glanced over and stuck her tongue out. “Jealous.”  
  
“Kihyun!” Minhyuk shouted excitedly. He shuffled round to stand in front of the television holding a huge cardboard box.   
  
“Hyung,” she whined, “you’re in the way.”  
  
“That’s ‘oppa’ to you, dongsaeng.” Minhyuk grinned. He switched the set off and dumped the box on the floor.  
  
“What’s that?” Wonho asked, sitting forward with interest.   
  
Minhyuk ripped the tape from the box and flipped open the cardboard flaps. He reached in and whipped out—  
  
“A bra?” Kihyun stuttered, eyes wide.  
  
“Several!” Minhyuk waved the bra around for emphasis. “I got our manager’s sisters to send over a box of clothes. They know what happened. There’s enough of ‘em that at least some of this stuff should fit you!”  
  
A door opened somewhere and slammed closed again. Wonho turned to see Hyunwoo and Changkyun traipsing in from one of the work rooms. He watched as Hyunwoo stopped dead in his tracks and stared at Minhyuk. His face flushed an interesting shade of red.  
  
“Minhyuk, if this is another one of your sick man-boob jokes…”  
  
Changkyun snorted loudly and sauntered over to rifle through the box. “Oh, noona--” he looked up and smirked at Kihyun, “--There’s some lovely stuff in here.”  
  
The colour seemed to have drained completely from Kihyun’s face. Wonho rubbed a thumb over her palm and glared at Minhyuk. “Why does she need girl clothes? Things might turn back to normal soon.”  
  
Minhyuk glared right back and stood up straight, hands on his hips. Wonho tried to swallow down the taste of fear. “Because,” Minhyuk hissed, “she might like to try these out for a bit of fun. They might be more comfortable for her! God knows she needs a bra for those puppies.”  
  
Kihyun surreptitiously crossed her arms over her chest and blushed.   
  
“Actually, I agree,” Hyunwoo said. He cleared his throat and sat on the arm of the sofa next to Kihyun. “It might be less weird for everyone, including Kihyun, if she tries wearing girl clothes.”  
  
Kihyun blushed even harder and Wonho shot her a sly grin before addressing Hyunwoo. “So it’s okay for one of the band to wear a bra, just so long as it’s not you?”  
  
“I don’t need one, okay? And besides, Wonho has bigger man boobs than me.” Hyunwoo scoffed, his cheeks flaring red again. Changkyun giggled and threw a blouse at him.  
  
“Right,” Minhyuk said, gathering the box up in his arms again. “Kihyun, come with me. We’re going to sort you out.”  
  
Kihyun shook beside Wonho. “Come with you where?”  
  
“To the bathroom!” Minhyuk smiled. “Go on, this’ll be fun. I haven’t played dress up since I was fourteen…” he trailed off as everyone stared. “Anyway, let’s go.”  
  
Kihyun slipped her hand from Wonho’s. She threw him a fearful glance before following Minhyuk. The happy pill was not to be messed with when frills and lace were around.   
  
Hyunwoo stood up and huffed a bit. “I need to go and do something manly.”  
  
“Why don’t you go knit Wonho another scarf?” Changkyun drawled, an incorrigible grin on his face.  
  
“Knitting isn’t just for girls!” Hyunwoo barked. He stomped out of the room. “I’m going to the gym!”  
  
Wonho curled over with giggles and flopped over so that his head was in Changkyun’s lap. “That was mean. I like my scarf.”  
  
Changkyun poked him in the cheek and grinned. “I know, but it’s funny to wind him up. He’s all highly strung since Kihyun went through The Change.”  
  
“That means menopause, you idiot—ouch!”  
  
“That’s what you get for insulting my intelligence.” Changkyun sniffed and examined his knuckles. “Anyway, you’re the idiot. Hyunwoo hyung better not be back when they’ve finished in there.”  
  
Wonho sat up and rubbed his arm. “Why not?”  
  
“You’ll probably pop a huge boner and have to run off somewhere to rub one out.”  
  
Wonho stared at Changkyun for ten whole seconds while the words sunk in. “What?! Im Changkyun, I’m disgusted. You’re never this crude!” Wonho babbled, pointing an accusatory finger at Changkyun. “And I’m not sure I like what you’re implying.”  
  
Changkyun batted his finger away and rolled his eyes. “I’m implying that you drooled over Kihyun hyung’s ass enough when he was a boy.” He raised an eyebrow pointedly. “Now that he’s a girl, I expect you’ll go into overdrive or combust.”  
  
Wonho scowled. Changkyun was too smug for his own good. Wonho ought to—-wait, drooled over who’s what now? “Huh?”  
  
“Whatever, hyung. You two climb all over each other like pathetic teenagers and you still won’t do anything about it.”  
  
“I don’t know what you mean,” Wonho said airily. He looked up at the ceiling. “I have a girlfriend.”  
  
“You always have like, three girlfriends,” Changkyun deadpanned. “But I still catch you making googly eyes at Kihyun when you think we’re not looking.”   
  
“I’m going to sue you for slander,” Wonho said. He pointed his index finger at Changkyun like a gun. “Or I’ll shoot you.” He pushed his thumb down and made a little clicking noise. “Bang bang!”  
  
“Get away.” Changkyun made to bite Wonho’s finger. “Kihyun does it too.”  
  
Wonho retracted his hand. “Oh?”  
  
“I’m just saying,” Changkyun said with a sigh of the long-suffering, “that you should be careful. Don’t do anything stupid and don’t let Hyunwoo hyung find out.” He stood up and pushed at Wonho’s shoulder. “I’m off. I feel like writing some lyrics in English.”  
  
“Oh, fuck you.” Wonho sniffed disdainfully. “I’m sure you know the meaning of that.”  
  
“I believe I do.” Changkyun said and proceeded to reel off a list of English curse words that Wonho had never heard before. He grinned and left the room.  
  
“I don’t think that’s even anatomically possible!” Wonho yelled after him. He slumped back into the cushions and fake-pouted before realising that Kihyun wasn’t there and so his efforts were futile.  


X

  
  
  
“Wake up!”  
  
Wonho woke with a start as a pillow hit him square in the face. “Wha’?” He sat up and rubbed at his face.   
  
“Wake up! It’s time to witness my genius.” Minhyuk stood in front of the couch, a scary grin curving his lips. “Kihyun! Come out!”  
  
Wonho blinked and tried to engage his brain. He checked his watch quickly; three hours since Minhyuk had whisked Kihyun away for her transformation.   
  
“This is so ridiculous!” Kihyun protested from the direction of the bathroom.   
  
Minhyuk rolled his eyes and clapped his hands together twice. “Chop, chop! It’s only me and Wonho.” He glanced over at Hyungwon rubbing his eyes sleepily in the corner. “…And Hyungwon.”  
  
“And me!” Changkyun grinned as he bounded out of his room. “I wouldn’t miss this for the world.”  
  
The bathroom door opened and Kihyun shuffled out. She tripped into the living room and the first thing Wonho noticed was the faint blush tinting her soft features. Then his eyes drifted lower.  
  
“What do you think?” Minhyuk asked excitedly. He grabbed hold of Kihyun and thrust her forward in front of the three members as if on display.  
  
“It looks like Kihyun in a skirt,” Hyungwon stated, all sleep gone from his eyes, “with socks shoved down his top.”  
  
Wonho cringed and watched as Kihyun’s eyes flashed with anger. She clenched her fists and made to leap on Hyungwon.   
  
“Stop!” Minhyuk restrained her and glared at Hyungwon. “What do you think, Wonho? Changkyun?”  
  
Changkyun blinked a few times. “It looks… nice.”  
  
Wonho took a moment to look Kihyun up and down; the little black ruffle skirt (that thing couldn’t be more than six inches long, God), white vest, visible bra straps. He swallowed heavily. “You look good, Ki.” He tried to smile. “Cute as a button.”  
  
Kihyun stopped trying to kill Hyungwon with her eyes and turned to beam at Wonho. “Really?”  
  
“Really,” Wonho affirmed.  
  
Kihyun twisted to show off her side profile. “This bra makes my boobs look epic!”  
  
Wonho concentrated on looking at her face. “Does it?”  
  
Minhyuk scoffed and grabbed Kihyun again. “Cute?” He shook his head at Wonho and twirled Kihyun round. “Look at her ass in this skirt. That is hot, my friend.”   
  
Wonho momentarily hated Minhyuk for being smug and cruel and for managing to make Kihyun’s ass even more life-changing than before.   
  
“Minhyuk!” Kihyun squeaked and squirmed in Minhyuk’s hold. “Stop treating me like a piece of meat.”  
  
Minhyuk laughed and let her go. “Oh, now you care about a woman’s feelings?”  
  
Kihyun blew a raspberry at Minhyuk and threw herself down onto Wonho’s lap. Wonho’s arms automatically went up to steady her, just as they did when Hyunwoo or Minhyuk sat on him.   
  
“You still walk like a boy, noona,” Changkyun sniggered.   
  
Kihyun leaned over and thumped him in the stomach. Hard. “I can still hit like a boy, too!”  
  
“What’s going on?” Hyunwoo stumbled in through the front door. He pulled his gloves and coat off, throwing them on a nearby stand. “Who’s hitting—oh, Kihyun. Hi.”  
  
“Hi Hyunwoo.” Kihyun smiled up at the leader from her Wonho-shaped seat.   
  
“You’re wearing a skirt.”   
  
Minhyuk chuckled behind a hand. “Yes, she is.” He wrapped an arm around Hyunwoo’s waist and poked his cheek. “Got a problem?”  
  
“Don’t you think she should be wearing something less… revealing.”  
  
Changkyun snorted and Wonho focused on _not_ looking down at Kihyun’s thighs. Hyungwon, however, was blatantly staring at them. “You take the father role way too seriously, hyung.” Changkyun said. “It’s not like anyone apart from us is going to see her anyway, and Minhyuk says her ass is—“  
  
“Anyway!” Minhyuk abruptly cut in, “Like Changkyun says, no one else is going to see her.”  
  
Hyunwoo frowned and Wonho felt slightly offended that the sentiment seemed to be directed at him. “Somehow, that doesn’t reassure me.”   
  
Kihyun tensed in Wonho’s lap. “It was fun, hyung. Minhyuk helped me. You were the one who said I should try wearing girl clothes!”  
  
Wonho grinned. One up on the leader. He had a flash of daydream; sliding a hand underneath Kihyun’s skirt and rubbing his face against the soft skin of her neck.   
  
“Don’t you think they make a cute couple?” Minhyuk teased. Or so he was leading Hyunwoo to believe. Wonho knew that Minhyuk _knew_.   
  
“Hmm.” Hyunwoo continued to frown. “I’m going to look over tomorrow’s schedule. Come on, Changkyun.”  
  
“Eh?” The youngest yelped as he was pulled up and away. “But I wasn’t done making fun of Kihyun hyung!”  
  
Kihyun huffed out a long breath. “I’m going to make some tea. I need to detox after all the crap I’ve been eating.”  
  
“You really are a girl,” Wonho teased, helping her up with his palms on her waist.  
  
“I’m not going to dignify that with a response,” Kihyun retorted.  
  
Wonho watched her leave. Changkyun was right – she did walk like a boy still, but damn if her ass didn’t look amazing in that skirt. He turned to a grinning Minhyuk who flopped down next to him. “I hate you,” he groaned. “Do you know how torturous that was?”  
  
“I think so, yes.” Minhyuk winked. “You can thank me later.”  
  
“She even shaved her legs and armpits!”  
  
“We waxed her, actually. It’s why we took so long.” Minhyuk giggled.   
  
Wonho just shook his head. “You’re meant to be the nice one, Min,” he sighed. “She’s like… every wet dream I’ve ever had, but come to life.”  
  
“As if you have wet dreams.” Minhyuk slapped his arm  
  
Wonho pouted and widened his eyes. “I will after this. Usually a girl sitting on my lap is a prelude to sex.”  
  
“You can’t have sex with Kihyun, Wonho.”  
  
Wonho wanted to curl up and die. “I can’t believe you just said that.” He hissed. “And shut up, she might hear you.”  
  
“I’m still here if you haven’t noticed.” Hyungwon mumbled from the corner he was sitting at.  
  
Minhyuk just shrugged and turned back to Wonho. “I know it was mean to tease,” he said with his brows furrowed, “but I just wanted to cheer her up. You can’t do anything, okay? You’re already switching on the charms whenever she’s around.”  
  
“I’m always charming.” Wonho put on his wickedest grin.   
  
Minhyuk mimed barfing. “Whatever. If Hyunwoo catches you in her panties, it’ll be worse than the time we held his burrito at ransom.”  
  
They both shuddered at the memory.  
  
“Why does everyone keep warning me about Hyunwoo? He’s my buddy.”  
  
“And my bed-warmer,” Minhyuk said, nodding, “but that won’t stop him from ripping your balls off if you deflower his daughter.”  
  
Wonho stared. “Oh, good grief.” He hid his face in his hands. “Why are we even having this conversation? I love Kihyun, I would never hurt her.”  
  
Minhyuk studied him for a second before his expression softened. “I know, Wonho.” He kissed Wonho’s cheek and hauled himself up. “I know.”  


X

  
  
  
Wonho spent the next week tearing his gaze from Kihyun on a regular basis; Minhyuk’s warning a mental chastity belt for his lust.   
  
Kihyun stayed at home again.   
  
Wonho glimpsed her through the bathroom door in the mornings, earphones in and singing whilst shaving her legs on the edge of the bath and wanted to throttle Changkyun when the youngest whispered, “imagine what she’d look like in heels,” into his ear one morning.   


X

  
  
  
Wonho scribbled down the last few notes of a bridge and dropped his pencil down on the paper. Rubbing a hand over his face tiredly, he glanced at the clock mounted on the wall – 3am. He groaned. Hyunwoo was going to open up a can of whup-ass with Wonho’s name on it if he was a zombie all day.   
  
Water. He needed water and then sleep.  
  
He opened the door carefully and stumbled through the apartment as quietly as he could with feet made of lead.   
  
“Wonho hyung?”  
  
Wonho had to fight to stop himself from screaming like a girl. Clutching his chest, he squinted through the darkness. “Kihyun? You scared the living crap out of me.” He picked his way over various game controllers and odd socks on the floor to slide down next to Kihyun on the sofa. “Why are you sitting in the dark? And why are we always on this couch?” Wonho smiled at her.  
  
Kihyun bit her nail and mumbled something into her hand.  
  
“What?” Wonho scooted closer. “You’ll have to speak up, I’m getting old.”  
  
“I’m… you know,” she whispered.  
  
“A weirdo?” Wonho grinned. “Yes, you are.”  
  
“Horny,” Kihyun said quickly. She blushed.  
  
“Oh,” Wonho said. He was very aware of how close they were. “Why are you out here?”  
  
Kihyun looked away. “Changkyun was still awake.”  
  
Wonho would usually spend a good few minutes teasing Kihyun about this, especially at their age, but this was different. He reached for her wrist, rubbing his thumb gently across the protruding bone. “Why don’t you go to the bathroom and, you know, sort it out?”  
  
“I can’t,” Kihyun mumbled, still not looking at Wonho.  
  
“Hey,” Wonho coaxed, “it’s okay. I’m pretty sure most girls get turned on.” He felt stupid saying it but seeing Kihyun so uneasy made his heart skip with sympathy.  
  
Kihyun finally turned her gaze back to him. “I don’t know how.” Her voice was a soft and a bit wobbly but her eyes were steady, daring Wonho to make fun of her.  
  
“Um,” Wonho said, “just… explore?”  
  
Kihyun glared at Wonho for a second before sighing. “I wouldn’t know where to start. I don’t want to hurt myself.”  
  
Wonho frowned. “Haven’t you ever…?”  
  
“You know I haven’t.”  
  
Wonho swallowed. “I could,” (and no, his brain shouted, don’t say it, don’t say it), “show you, if you like?”  
  
Kihyun stared at him. “What?”  
  
“Not in a creepy way!” Wonho insisted. “But like… as a friend. It’d be like group masturbation or something. Bonding.”  
  
Kihyun raised a newly-plucked eyebrow. “We’ve never done that.”  
  
“But we could have.” Wonho grinned.   
  
“It’s a little creepy, you have to admit.”  
  
“But are you still in the mood?”  
  
Kihyun grimaced. “Yes. I’ve been like it all night. It won’t go away!”  
  
“Then let me help you.” Wonho slid his arm around Kihyun’s shoulders and pulled her close. “We’re friends, aren’t we? You trust me, right?” Déjà vu. The countless other times he’d said this and how meaningless it’d been until now. “I’ll show you quickly and then we can both go to sleep and forget about it. Everyone’s in bed already. They won’t know.”  
  
“Hyung…”  
  
Wonho slipped a hand down and ran it along the smooth skin of her thigh, just skimming the bottom of her skirt. “Or--” he nuzzled her ear and whispered, “--You can sit here all night and never learn.”  
  
Kihyun bit her lip and shifted into Wonho’s touch. “Okay,” she breathed, “but if you dare tell anyone about this…”  
  
“I won’t tell a soul.” Wonho smiled against her ear and pulled back. “Lie down.”  
  
Kihyun twisted and pressed herself back against the cushions. She parted her legs slightly and blushed. Wonho’s mind flashed with violent images of flesh and sweat, the raw lust that came with animal instinct. He shook his head, clearing them away. Kihyun. She was his focus.  
  
“Take your underwear off.”   
  
Kihyun stared at him. Wonho snorted and they both giggled, Kihyun flushing bright red. “This is so ridiculous, hyung.”  
  
“It is,” Wonho agreed, still chuckling. “But what’s a bit of masturbational instruction between friends?”  
  
“Masturbational?” Kihyun laughed as she struggled out of her panties. “You idiot.” She dropped them on the floor and looked at Wonho expectantly.  
  
Wonho caught his breath and sat forward between her legs. “Okay,” he began, “I’ll start with my thumb. Just slide it between like—“  
  
“Oh my God.” Kihyun covered her face with an arm and giggled again. “Don’t talk, please. Not in your porn voice. I’ll die of laughter and then we won’t get anywhere.”  
  
Wonho coughed back a laugh and nodded. “Right, right, I’ll just…” his voice trailed off as he slipped a hand between Kihyun’s thighs. He could feel the wet warmth radiating from her already, natural and new. If this was going to be her first orgasm as a girl, Wonho was sure as hell going to make sure she remembered it.  
  
Stroking lightly, Wonho teased the soft skin of her thighs. He watched her face intently and smiled when her legs spread further apart automatically. Kihyun inhaled sharply as Wonho thumbed her coarse hair, exhaled softly when he slid the thumb into her, hot and smooth. Rubbing in slow, even circles, Wonho kept watching.  
  
“Oh,” she gasped when he pressed a tiny bit harder, “that’s so nice. Different.”  
  
Nice, Wonho chuckled as the word resounded in his head. This was going to be more than nice. He let his thumb slip down, brought it back up in a slow, teasing drag, moisture gathering with the stimulation.  
  
“Fuck,” Kihyun moaned, a choked whimper behind the word. She grabbed a cushion and pressed it over her face.   
  
Wonho hummed in agreement and continued moving his hand. She was so hot inside. Wonho wanted to push in, let her know how good it could really be, but at the same time he couldn’t. He valued Kihyun’s feelings, and his own life.   
  
Kihyun let out a strangled groan, half-muffled into the cushion, and Wonho felt his resolve weaken. He steadied himself and tripped his free hand up her thighs to push a finger in, just one, just a bit. She gasped and lifted her hips up into the sensation.  
  
“Shh,” Wonho murmured. Coaxing her back down, Wonho worked his finger inside her in a poor imitation of what he really wanted to do. His other hand worked on winding her like a spring.   
  
“Stop,” Kihyun gasped out.  
  
Wonho blinked. “Stop?”  
  
“Fuck,” she moaned. “I don’t know. Make me come. Too much.”  
  
She clenched around him and Wonho wanted nothing more than to throw her down and fuck her until they both screamed. It scared him, the need, so he focused his attentions on the way her chest heaved with his breath, the increasing wetness sliding into the creases between his fingers. “You’re beautiful,” he whispered.  
  
Kihyun threw the cushion away and gasped, shuddering and contracting around Wonho. Flushed cheeks, glassy eyes and parted lips; Wonho was reminded of the melody he’d been writing before. Simple, easy. Beautiful.  
  
Wonho pressed lightly with his thumb, once more, before withdrawing. He sucked absently on his fingers as the pleasure spiked again on Kihyun’s face.   
  
“Oh God, oppa,” she groaned when she looked up at him. “Don’t do that.”  
  
“Sorry.” Wonho slipped his fingers out. He wanted to drag them, sticky, along the soft planes of Kihyun’s stomach. Kihyun calling him ‘oppa’ wasn’t helping him turn off either. “Bad habit.” He smiled. “Feel better now?”  
  
“Amazing,” she whispered. The satisfied blush suited her. “Can you do it again?”  
  
Wonho laughed at that. “Slut,” he said affectionately. “It’s late. We really need to sleep.”  
  
“But I want to do it again,” Kihyun whined, starting to slide her own hand down.   
  
Wonho caught hold of her arm before she could go any further. “If you want to keep your virginity intact, I suggest you don’t do that.”  
  
Kihyun’s mouth formed a little ‘o’ before relaxing into a smile. “I’d let you,” she said, breathless. “If you wanted.”  
  
Wonho closed his eyes and willed himself to calm down. “Don’t say that.” Any further thoughts were cut off when the lights were flicked on and everything became a mess of bright light.  
  
“What. The fuck. Is going on here?” Hyunwoo’s voice across the room, low and authoritative.   
  
Kihyun swore and simultaneously tried to sit up whilst tugging her skirt down. Wonho was frozen, half-turned and staring at Hyunwoo.  
  
Hyunwoo’s gaze trailed to Kihyun’s abandoned underwear before going back to Wonho. “What did you do to her?”  
  
Kihyun huffed and snatched the panties off the floor. “He didn’t do anything. He was helping me.”  
  
“Helping you get pregnant?” Hyunwoo snarled. “That’d be a fine mess.”  
  
“Don’t be so dramatic,” Kihyun snapped. She pushed Wonho away to stand up on shaky legs. “He was being nice. I’m not stupid.”  
  
“Hyunwoo,” Wonho started.  
  
“Don’t,” Hyunwoo cut him off. “I can’t talk to you when I’m this angry. I can’t believe you would do this behind my back.”  
  
“Don’t take it out on Kihyun.” Wonho hated confrontation, but hated the thought of Kihyun being blamed even more.  
  
“Shut up.”   
  
Wonho did as he was told. Kihyun glared at Hyunwoo before turning to Wonho.  
  
“Thank you, Wonho oppa. I’m sorry about this.” She touched his cheek briefly before gritting her teeth and brushing past Hyunwoo, steadfastly ignoring him.  
  
“I’ve seen the way you look at her,” Hyunwoo said softly. He switched the lights off and left.  
  
Wonho sat forward, put his head between his knees and wanted to die.  


X

  
  
  
“Is Hyunwoo hyung talking to you yet?”  
  
Wonho cracked an eye open as Minhyuk sat down beside him in the kitchen.   
  
“No. He thinks I tried to rape Kihyun or something.” He cracked the other eye open and fixed Minhyuk with a _look_. “I didn’t, before you ask. Nothing was going on.”  
  
Minhyuk held up his hands in mock defense. “Did I say anything?”  
  
“Um.” Changkyun appeared in the doorway. “Hyung, we have a problem.”  
  
Wonho scowled. “I hate you.”  
  
Changkyun tried to keep a straight face. “I mean it. We have a serious problem. In the bathroom.”  
  
Minhyuk frowned. “Come on then, we’d better follow Mr Pied Piper here.”  
  
“I’m not sure I like being referred to as a rat,” Wonho said as they entered the bathroom.  
  
“Hmph,” Hyunwoo snorted.  
  
“Oh for God’s sake.” Wonho turned to leave.  
  
“Stop it, both of you.” Minhyuk leaned over to smack them both upside the head. All attention turned to Kihyun, standing nervously by the sink. “Kihyun, what’s wrong?”  
  
“Um.” She cringed. “I’m bleeding. From my… thing.”  
  
The silence was eerie. Wonho could practically smell the masculine fear in the room. “Well,” he said resolutely, “that explains why you were so horny last night. Hormones!”  
  
Kihyun looked at him in amazement before slapping herself on the forehead. The chaos that broke out rivaled that of the first time Changkyun got a phone call from a girl who wasn’t a mother or sister.   


X

  
  
  
Wonho crept through the apartment quietly. It was mid-afternoon and he’d been outlawed for the day after his slip-up of a confession. From the various hushed whispers and stomping feet, he’d been able to gather that Hyungwon and Minhyuk had given Kihyun a very detailed explanation of what to do and how to do it. Hyunwoo had snuck out for supplies. The rappers were nowhere to be seen.  
  
This thought alone kept Wonho happy through his isolation – the image of Hyunwoo furtively sneaking round a shop to buy maxi-pads and tampons. How Wonho wished for stalkerazzi photos of that.  
  
They were out with management, to give Kihyun some space and to discuss the research progress. Obviously, Wonho hadn’t been deemed fit for this outing.   
  
“Kihyun?” Wonho pushed open her bedroom door and his heart sank a bit when he saw her curled up on the bed. “Are you okay?”  
  
Kihyun looked up with big, sad eyes. “It hurts.”   
  
Wonho slid himself onto the bed and lay down next to her. “I’m sorry.”  
  
She wriggled closer to Wonho and clutched the front of his t-shirt.  
  
“Make it stop?” Her voice was so pained that Wonho couldn’t help but put his arm around her for a sort of half-cuddle.  
  
“I wish I could.” He rubbed her back in light circles. “Did you take any painkillers?”  
  
“Hyunwoo oppa gave me some. Didn’t work.”   
  
Wonho sighed and stopped stroking her back to reach up and touch her face lightly. “What a mess, huh?”  
  
“You should see the state of my underwear,” Kihyun snorted.  
  
Wonho giggled and made a face. “Still the same old Kihyun.” He brushed his thumb along the edge of her mouth.  
  
“I haven’t changed,” Kihyun said earnestly. Their faces were very close. “Not really. I’m still me.”  
  
Wonho tried to tear his gaze away from her lips. “I know,” he whispered.   
  
“I’m glad you’re here with me,” Kihyun whispered back.  
  
Wonho ran gentle fingers across the warm silk of Kihyun’s cheek. “Kihyun, I-“ he started, “—even if you hadn’t changed—“ he paused.  
  
“Yes?” Kihyun’s eyes were close. Her mouth was closer; Wonho could feel her breath against his face.  
  
Wonho’s breath hitched in his chest. “I don’t want you to think that just because—“  
  
“I don’t,” Kihyun murmured, soft against Wonho’s lips. “I don’t.”  
  
“Um,” Minhyuk’s voice cut through the room. “You better break this up before Hyunwoo hyung comes in like… five seconds.”  
  
Wonho sighed. He pressed his thumb to Kihyun’s mouth apologetically before scooting back and sitting up.   
  
Hyunwoo appeared behind Minhyuk. “Wonho, what are you doing?”  
  
“She’s in pain.” Wonho looked at Hyunwoo pleadingly. “Please let me look after her?”  
  
Hyunwoo frowned.  
  
“I used to help out my mom when she got like this as a child.” It was weak, but Wonho just wanted Kihyun to feel better. “I can get her a hot water bottle and some tea.”  
  
“Wonho was taking care of me,” Kihyun said, voice small and sad. Wonho felt a near-painful wave of love for her.  
  
Hyunwoo stared at them for long seconds. “Fine,” he muttered and turned away. Minhyuk shrugged and followed him down the hallway.   
  
“I’ll get you some tea,” Wonho sighed.   
  
“I don’t want tea.” Kihyun smiled and pulled Wonho back down, their knees barely touching. “Just stay.”  


X

  
  
  
“All the tests came back negative. You’re perfectly healthy, Kihyun.”  
  
“Am I going to change back?”  
  
“I- I don’t know. The doctors are mystified.”  
  
“Is there a chance I’ll be stuck like this forever?”  
  
“Possibly. I’m sorry, Kihyun.”  
  
“…”  
  
“Kihyun?”  
  
“I don’t want to be a girl, hyung.”  


X

  
  
  
Wonho’s piano radar went off at exactly 01:36am on Wednesday morning. He was drinking an unwise cup of coffee in the kitchen. Everyone should have been sleeping – interviews, signings and recordings were penciled in for the next day’s schedule. However, a thin strip of light from one of the workrooms and the faint clack of keys suggested otherwise. Investigation was called for.  
  
Wonho was surprised to find Kihyun sitting at one of the keyboards, headphones on, eyes closed and fingers flying over the keys. Wonho could already imagine the melody. He padded over and touched her shoulder lightly. She startled and looked up in surprise, headphones jerking off awkwardly with the movement.  
  
“Oh!” She fumbled with the headphones. “Did I wake you? I’m sorry, I know you have work soon.”  
  
“It’s okay,” Wonho reassured. “I’m on a caffeine kick anyway. Have you been writing?” He gestured to the paper scattered around the keyboard.  
  
Kihyun nodded. “Sort of. It’s nothing really.”  
  
“Can I see?” Wonho smiled.  
  
Kihyun handed him the papers and fidgeted. “If you want.”  
  
Wonho scanned the notes, the skeleton of a melody, rough drafts of a chorus. “Looks beautiful.”  
  
“Not as good as your stuff.”  
  
Wonho glanced up and put on his cockiest grin. “Well, what is?” Kihyun rolled her eyes and pulled Wonho closer by his hips. It did not go unnoticed to Wonho that he stood between her legs. “What is this, Kihyun?” he asked softly.  
  
She looked up at him and shrugged. “I’m not sure.” She paused as Wonho knelt so they could talk at the same level. “But I think I understand why you have so many fangirls.”  
  
Wonho cupped her jaw gently. “We shouldn’t. Hyunwoo will kill me.”  
  
“Fuck him,” Kihyun whispered. She leant in and closed her eyes. “I don’t think I can help myself.”  


X

  
  
  
Wonho had never thought it would be so easy to have an affair with a band-mate. Never realised how soft Kihyun’s hands were, how warm her mouth was. Never imagined anything would feel so perfect.  


X

  
  
  
As soon as Changkyun forced himself off to bed, Wonho slid an arm around Kihyun’s shoulders and pulled her close.   
  
“They’ve only just gone to bed,” Kihyun whisper-yelled.  
  
Wonho laughed and leaned in to kiss her cheek. “Relax. I’ll use you as a shield if Hyunwoo tries to murder me with Minhyuk’s giant scented candles.”  
  
Kihyun snorted but pushed herself into Wonho’s embrace. “This is nice.”  
  
“I always strive for nice.” Wonho tried to look annoyed. It failed horribly when he smiled. Kihyun slipped warm fingers under Wonho’s t-shirt and stroked absently at his belly. Wonho really, really wanted to kiss her. “You know,” he started, grinning, “this is the longest I’ve seen a girl without sleeping together.”  
  
Kihyun slapped his stomach lightly. “You know we can’t do that.” She bit gently at his shoulder. “I thought you said I was getting quite good with my mouth?”  
  
“You are.” Wonho tickled her ribs teasingly. “You’re also getting on well with those multiple orgasms.”  
  
Kihyun laughed and rubbed her face against Wonho’s neck. “Mm, those are definitely an advantage of being a girl.”  
  
“It’s funny…”   
  
“Your face?” Kihyun jibed.  
  
Wonho shifted to look at her. He tweaked her nose. “No. That my ideal girl turned out to be you with boobs.”  
  
Kihyun raised an eyebrow. “Is that meant to be a compliment, mister?”  
  
Wonho slid his arm from around her and cupped her face with both his hands. “Kihyun.”  
  
Kihyun reached up and covered one of Wonho’s hand with her own. “Yes?”  
  
Wonho took a deep breath. “I think I love you.”  
  
When Kihyun kissed him like she really meant it, all Wonho could think was _why did it take me so long to see?_  


X

  
  
  
Morning sunlight filtered into the living room. Wonho groaned and rubbed his eyes. His neck ached from the uncomfortable position on the couch. Kihyun was still asleep on top of him, morning erection digging into Wonho’s thigh.  
  
Wonho froze.  
  
“Wonho hyung?” Kihyun moaned and wriggled to turn his face away from the light.   
  
“Kihyun,” Wonho hissed, not daring to move. “Kihyun, wake up.”  
  
“Hm?” Kihyun lifted his head and blinked sleepily. “’Sup?” Wonho put his palm on Kihyun’s chest and pushed him up. Kihyun’s eyes went wide with shock. “Ohmygod!” He struggled up from Wonho and the couch. “I’m back! What the fuck! I’m back!” He grinned madly at Wonho and jumped up and down. “Oh my God!”  
  
Wonho couldn’t help but laugh. “Yeah, you are.” He stretched and slipped up onto his feet. “Welcome back.”  
  
Kihyun let out a shout of joy and launched himself into Wonho’s arms. Wonho stumbled but clung to Kihyun, the old familiar hard lines of Kihyun’s body burning holes in his composure. He leaned back to kiss Kihyun.  
  
“Whoah.” Kihyun pulled back and stared at Wonho. “What are you doing?”  
  
Wonho blinked, confused. “I thought-?”  
  
Kihyun looked away awkwardly and pulled away from Wonho completely. “But I’m a guy again.”  
  
Wonho tried to ignore the ships sinking in his stomach. “I said that didn’t matter.”  
  
“It matters to me.” Kihyun bit at his lip worriedly and looked back at Wonho. “It’s wrong.”   
  
“But last night—“  
  
“Last night I had boobs.”  
  
Wonho couldn’t really hear what Kihyun was saying. A sort of white noise had taken residence in his head, a distorted image of Kihyun saying he didn’t love Wonho.   
  
“I can’t love you as a man.”  
  
Wonho sank back onto the sofa. He could vaguely hear Minhyuk’s excited shouting and Hyunwoo’s laughter in the background.   
  
“Wonho hyung?”  
  
How did a heart break? Was it another chemical reaction? One tiny knock and it would splinter? A larger one and it would crack in half?  
  
“Wonho hyung!”  
  
He blinked. Jooheon was crouching in front of him, worried eyes and furrowed brow. “Huh?”  
  
It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all, but all Wonho could think was _I wish I hadn’t seen at all_.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this. Let me know how you liked it in the comments. :)


End file.
